“The Miracle in Third Period” — Meridian, MS — In what has been dubbed “The Miracle in Third Period” by teachers and staff, 13-year-old Cecil Jacobs walked into Miss Ewell’s classroom on time with all the necessary materials to complete the day’s lesson on fractions. “This is the first time he’s complied with the first two…

An Excursion Inspired by Excrement — Let’s talk about shit(tiness). I’m liberal. I don’t like Trump AT ALL. I think he is an awful person. A sentiment I don’t mind defending and frequently do defend on The Facebook. (So many confrontations, so little time.) …

…But the Women Who Carry Them Are. — I made a short list of ways that fetuses are clumps of cells and not yet human in response to a pro-lifer who insisted that the clump of cells growing in a woman's womb is human at the moment of conception. Essentially, she was trying to out science the pro-choice…

Hi, this is Jarrett with Medium Benefits*. How are you today? — “Kevin” from Senior Benefits** rang me yesterday as I left the gym. He called to talk about a program that covers 100% of funeral expenses. I reacted with thunderous enthusiasm and overzealous gratitude that, of all the plebes “Kevin” could have called, he phoned me. “OH ‘KEVIN!’” I exclaimed. “I’m…

A Language? Or Frustrating Contrivance? — Oh, Alphabet! Thy name is “deceit”. With twenty-six letters, but replete With an array of forty-four sounds. A formula that only confounds Any logical approach to learn, Speak, write, and accurately discern A language that’s so convoluted; So conspicuously diluted By letters, whose pronunciation Often depend on the location. I…

…It’s in South Central Oklahoma… — Let’s talk about Love. That’s a broad topic, I’ll narrow it down. Not the fluttery feeling that comes when you see that special someone. Not the guy who lived in my apartment complex and gave me cigarettes while we talked about rock and roll music and deadbeat dads. I’m talking…

…Doesn't Make You a Chicken. Just as Saying “I'm Not Racist” Doesn't Make You Not A Racist. — “I don’t think a lot of people take it seriously because they don’t live this life. If you don’t live this life you have the privilege and the power to not understand it.” Let’s talk about (not) understanding. More specifically, I’d like to discuss the concept of “the privilege and the power to not understand”.

Roe v. The Second Amendment — Bandera, TX — With gun control legislation seemingly imminent in the wake of mass shootings including at an elementary school in Uvalde, Texas, a grocery store in a predominantly African American neighborhood in Buffalo, New York, and most recently in Tulsa and Philadelphia — gun owners are coming up with…

“We need doors with locks and deadbolts, and handles…” — San Antonio, TX — “There’s an epidemic in today’s institutions. No, not an epidemic of germs or a virus. No, not an epidemic of poverty or drugs. I’m talking about an epidemic of unsecured doors.” Said senator Ted Cruz (R- TX) at a Thursday press conference in San Antonio, somehow…